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Unsolicited Advice

Why wait for readers to ask questions before suggesting solutions? An advice column that cuts out the middleman.

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When forming a new habit: consider not starting small?

When forming a new habit: consider not starting small?

The 'tiny habits' theory works by drastically reducing the amount of effort. But miniscule-effort for zero-reward is still maths that works out to "not worth it".

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Making new friends in adulthood

Making new friends in adulthood

Framing it so you give a reason as to "why am I asking you now, when I never have before?" and lowers the emotional intensity

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Getting a refund on online shopping when you missed the returns deadline

Getting a refund on online shopping when you missed the returns deadline

This isn't a 'hack' it's just, sometimes people will help you if you ask nicely, but you might not have realised this is something you can ask for.

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Giving first aid / CPR does a lot of good, even if you don't save their life

Giving first aid / CPR does a lot of good, even if you don't save their life

If your loved one died, I think you would care a lot that someone was with them, trying to save them, vs finding out that no one attempted to help.

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The science of gift-giving

The science of gift-giving

A few research papers into how we go wrong when buying gifts for others. The mistake of overindividuation When shopping for multiple people, you tend to get different things for different people (because it seems impersonal to get everyone the same thing) and as a result, tend to buy worse

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Task prioritisation is fake

Task prioritisation is fake

Do or do not. There is no "prioritise"

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'Apartners' - what it's like to live apart from your husband or wife

On living apart from your spouse

It’s really nice knowing that, every time you see your partner, it’s because they made the choice to be with you, not just because they happened to be in the same physical location by chance anyway.

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cleaning decluttering overwhelmed help

How to clean a cluttered space when you’re overwhelmed

No matter how cluttered your space is, remember it only has 5 things in it: trash, dishes, clothing, things that have a spot, things that don’t have a spot. Don’t look at the whole morass.

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Photo of Author Dave Farland. Not everything is fixable, and that's better than the alternative.

It's okay that not everything is fixable

There's a fallacy that if we can define the solution space, a solution must exist that fits there. But the fundamental problem was, "Dave is dead."

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Chronos is clock time, whereas kairos is living time.

Chronos vs Kairos: Understanding how the Ancient Greeks viewed time will make your life richer

“Chronos” is measured and counted, while “kairos” is lived and experienced